R. Kelly and the American Bad-ass.

the work week is almost over.  this makes me happy.  i had a huge success at school today.  every Thursday morning from 9:50-10:30 i teach English to kindergarten children.  remember poking ant hills when you were little?  that's what kindergarten is like.  needless to say i dread this morning of the week.  i honestly consider faking sick every week...its that bad.  but yesterday i got a bright idea: i thought up a game that teaches them colors and at the same time gets rid of that loathsome energy that they always seem to have.  i spent about 2 minutes in the classroom teaching them blue, red, green, and yellow.  then we went outside where i had already set up the activity.  i had cut out the letters for each color in the appropriate colored construction paper and tacked them to four different trees.  we got outside and i explained, with the help of my co-teacher, that when i held up the card for a color, the kids were to run to that tree.  so basically all we did for about 20 minutes was run from one tree to another....brilliant.

if you noticed my Facebook status, it said that last night I had the single most awkward night of my life.  here's the story....

the principal invited jessica, myself, my two korean co-english teachers, the manager of the english center, and the vice principal out for dinner.  my principal is one those men who loves his high position and looks down upon the rest of us unfortunate souls who aren't principals.  he loves to boast of his ability to speak Chinese (which i'm not convinced he can actually do), smokes at school, and loves to drink Soju (some type of korean liquor).  He also has a special knack for awkwardness.  after his 43rd shot of Soju, the principal decides its time to move on to the dinner after-party.  given that this is Korea, its a good bet that we'll end up at a karaoke bar.  it is also impolite to turn down an invitation to a social gathering.  so we exit the restaurant.  the principal is in a very good mood.  and then it happens....he takes my hand.  i thought he was just pulling me out of the way of an on-coming car as the city streets are very narrow here.  he would release me as soon as danger has passed.  but that doesn't happen.  instead he begins to walk...my hand still in his grip.

we had read before arriving in Korea that it is common for two men or two women to hold hands as they walk.  its nothing more than a sign of friendship.  however, i'm from South Carolina.

long story short, the principal and i walk the entire 10 minutes from the restaurant to the karaoke bar hand in hand, best buddies.  oh and i forgot to mention, we don't speak the same language, so there's awkward silence the entire way...the rest of the group lagged behind to watch and giggle.

so the evening ended with a little karaoke, beer, dried squid and peanuts.  lovely combination.  everyone sang but me.  i refused.  i had enough humiliation for the day.  jessica decided she would sing, but only if sophy and susie, the korean english teachers, would sing with her.  so all three went to the stage.  i tried my best to get jessica to pick American Bad-ass by Kid Rock, but they ended up singing R. Kelly's I Believe I Can Fly....priceless.

Update....

Sorry.  I've been sort of busy so i've neglected to give you updates from Korea.  its tuesday morning and my 2nd period class was cancelled for some reason.  As is usually the case, i'm clueless as to why my students are not here, but i'm enjoying it nonetheless.  This past weekend Jessica and I went to Seoul to spend a night for my birthday.  we rode the bus saturday morning.  when we arrived we made our way across the city on the subway to our guesthouse/hostel.  it was a very nice place, sort of like a college dorm, but we were able to get a private room instead of the larger community bunkbed style rooms.  after checking in, we went back out into the city and found an outback steakhouse and starbucks...a couple of very nice indulgences to celebrate my 29th.  we explored the city most of the night, then headed back to get some sleep around 12:30am.

the next day we got up and check out and caught the subway towards Gyeongbukgung (the palace you can see from our previous trip to Seoul in my FB pics).  We happened upon it at just the right time, as the Guard was changing.  After that we hit Starbucks again (for the 3rd time in less than 24 hrs).  The Starbucks in this area of town has to be my favorite of all time.  it was 4 stories high and the top floor was a rooftop patio overlooking the city.  we wanted to stay longer but had to catch the bus for the 2.5 hr ride home.

back at school on monday, i was teaching my students the new vocabulary words for the week.  one verb we were learning was "sit".  koreans pronounce the "s" as "sh", so i'm sure you can imagine what happened when i taught them the verb sit...12 children all yelling "shit! shit! shit!"   sorry if those words are offensive to some readers, and i don't normally use them, but i had to try my hardest not to laugh out loud at them in class.  it was even harder not to roll in the floor laughing when i told them "no", and they persisted with more urgency because for all they knew, they were pronouncing the word correctly, and were certain that i was mistaken in telling them they were wrong. 

so another week has begun, and i'm already counting down to the weekend.  so goes the 9 to 5.....

Friday...

1.  its friday!  one class down, three to go.  we'll stay in Yeongju tonight then catch an early bus to Seoul.  One of my co-teachers (Susie) was able to find a guest house for us in Seoul.  Almost everything was booked because its the weekend.  We got one of the last rooms available.  We'll post pictures of our weekend on Sunday or Monday.

2.  I finally got a cell phone.  its been over a month since i've had one so its an odd, yet familiar feeling. 

3.  all of the teachers at school have a wooden stick.  this is used for pointing the various things on the board.  mine is used for beating a hard surface to quiet my classroom.  yesterday my 6th graders would not stop chatting during the lesson.  its a small class so we were sitting in a circle.  i gave the floor one good whack with my stick.  it broke.  there were eight sets of eyes wide open and eight mouths shut.  there was silence as i glared and everyone heard the broken piece roll across the floor.  it was a priceless moment.

thursday...

its thursday.  thursday is kindergarten day.  my favorite.  kindergarten children have no reason to want to learn English.  they would rather pick their nose......which is exactly what they do.  in the month that we've been here, today was only the second time i've had to teach them.  it was two times too many.  I got a lot of help from my native co-teacher sophy.  actually she taught the class for me.  i got to observe how you teach children that small a foreign language.  and here's the secret: speak 99% of the time in their native language, korean, and 1% in the target language, english.  of course you see the problem.  oh well.  it is what it is. 

Jessica and I are going to Seoul this weekend for my birthday.  starbucks, english movie, outback (if we can find it.)  I'm excited.  i shaved my beard lastnight so maybe i can convince people its my 22nd birthday instead of my 29th. 

as i type this, there's a second grade student that walked into my classroom.  she's standing beside my desk and staring at me.  i asked her if she wanted a beer but i got no response.  maybe she doesn't understand me.

anyway, back to the update.  i'm going to try to relate a very funny story....at least i find it funny.  on monday when i went to the men's room outside of the administration office, all of the urinals apparently had some air built up in the pipes, or something like that.  they are also motion-sensored flushers.  so when i walk up to do what i gotta do, the motion sensor was triggered and it flushed as i was standing there.  not a problem, as this is what it usually does.  only this time, as i mentioned above, there is air in the pipes.  so the flush projected urinal water on my pants.  it was clean water though.  right.  so now every day after monday i've been paranoid about the explosive flushing.  so the routine is: approach the urinal, unzip, extract the equipment, begin to release muscle pressure......and it starts to flush.  i have gotten myself into the habit of jumping back at this moment.  let me remind you that at this moment the aforementioned equipment is getting some fresh air, and the bathroom is right outside of the principal's office.  so i'm sure you can imagine the scene when the toilet begins to flush (and i'm still paranoid about it splashing me), i'm about to release, and the door opens.......

1 month down, 11 (or more...) to go

today is october 11th.  we flew from Greenville on Saturday September 11 (the day that "pastor" in florida was going to burn the korans....anybody even remember that guy?).  we've adjusted well to life in Yeongju.  life is becoming normal.  Jessica has found some great ways to fill her time and i've become quite fond of kimchi.  our little apartment is very cozy.  who would have thought that we would be very happy and content with a studio? 

we've had trouble finding a good church...and one that speaks English.  I've decided to try one in the big cities, either Seoul to the north or Daegu to the south.  our plan, when we find the right one, is to make the trip (2hrs one way) one sunday every month for the fellowship.  the other three sundays we want to have a consistent Bible study and prayer time at home. 

Going to Seoul next weekend.  its my birthday!  we've learned there's a theatre playing English movies right beside the bus station in Seoul.  We'll probably stay overnight. 

In other news, the scissors in my desk at school have "Ms. Cheng" written on the handle.  I might be the only one who finds this funny...and i'm ok with that. 

sick....

i didn't feel altogether wonderful riding to school on Tuesday, but i thought it was because I stayed up too late the night before.  during my first two classes of the day, i slowing started feeling worse.  i barely touched my kimchi and fish-brain soup at lunch, and eventually ended up in the nurse's office.  she took my temperature and gave me some tylenol, and I slept through my afternoon classes on a little bed with Hello Kitty sheets.  I was freezing when i went see the nurse, wearing my sweater and gloves.  the beds are heated, so the nurse turned it on and i was out cold.   when i woke up an hour later, i was sweating, not from my fever, but from the boiling-lava-hot bed i was laying in.  so i stayed out from school today and i'll be back tomorrow.

in other news, we found out that there are Outback Steakhouses in Seoul.  I know where i'm going for my birthday in a couple of weeks!

trash and shoes...

the korean way of recycling and trash organization is puzzling to me.  we've asked multiple times but i'm still not sure, confident actually, that we're doing it incorrectly.  there are 3 different cans outside the apartment, all of which have food waste in them.  beside the cans are the government mandated green plastic bags for other waste.  however, there is always food in the bags.  i just don't understand what goes where.  therefore, we have resorted to taking our trash out under the cover of darkness.  lastnight i went out after midnight with our full trash bags so as to avoid any glares or people explaining to me (in korean) that my empty box of moon pies does not go in the same bag as uneaten Kimchi cassarole, and at the same time the apple cores and the mountain dew bottle should be bagged together.

at school, everyone removes their shoes in the front lobby and slips into sandals provided in little cubby holes.  all of the teachers have their own sandals except for me.  i just wear the ones provided for guests.  i've managed to find one pair that is big enough for my feet.  all of the other pairs that i sometimes get stuck with are too small...for little asian feet.  i started wondering today, when i had to select the smaller shoe option, who keeps taking the big set.  apparently there are asian people with inordinately large feet.  you know what they say about big feet....well....i'm in asia....nevermind.

Asian Beatles....

I got my hair cut.  I can't remember when the last time was.  So I was understandably a bit nervous.  I always hate getting my hair cut...its too traumatic.  So Jessica and I walked downtown and studied two different options....one was a salon for men.  inside were younger women cutting hair.  they looked like they knew what they were doing.  the second option was two doors down, a salon with mostly women customers, and stylish looking women stylists.  given that this was my first haircut in the eastern hemisphere, I opted for option #2...the stylish looking women.  they couldn't mess this up too bad.  20 min later, I looked like a cross between an Asian school girl and Paul McCartney (circa. 1963).


Yesterday Jessica and I were walking around town taking a few photographs, just being lazy.  We had been out for a while and were headed back to the apartment.  We had noticed a broken chair on the curb.  Koreans, at least the ones in Yeongju, leave their trash on the curb for pickup.  Occasionally we have scored some really cool things people have thrown out (table, mirror, etc.).  Normally we wait for nightfall to retrieve the items we spotted during the day, just to make sure that they are indeed trash.  Yesterday, there was no mistaking that this particular BROKEN chair was somebody's garbage.  So I told Jessica that we should just go ahead and carry it home.  Hesitation.  After some gentle persuading, Jessica made a move for the chair.  Not 3 1/2 seconds later some elderly Korean woman is shouting at us.  We both looked at each other.  (Side note: What i don't understand about some people here is that when it is obvious even to a deaf and blind person that we don't understand what someone is saying, they continue to speak Korean, as if we'll eventually get it.)  Long story short, we were stealing her chair, her BROKEN chair sitting on the curb next to the trash bags....well, one of us was stealing it.  so Jessica put it down and we went on our way.


Homeplus sells ninja swords and nun-chucks...in the sporting goods section.

Lazy Saturday....

First things first....

The really cool picture at the top with the blog title in it was taken by Jessica.  She's a budding photographis.  I'm attempting to persuade her to begin a photo journal/blog of every day life for us in Korea.  Maybe if she gets some encouragement from those of you reading this she'll start it.  To see a couple more of her pictures, go to www.hereandtherefornow.blogspot.com.  Both the title picture and the smaller one of me are her photos.

We're a lot closer to being in a routine.  Its a good feeling.  Greenville will always be home, but Yeongju is feeling more and more comfortable.  Today Jessica and I had a very lazy Saturday.  We slept in til 11am.  After getting up she made some coffee and I cooked one of my world-famous omelettes.  We took our time getting ready and went out for a walk by the river.  Much to our surprise, when we approached the river, there were at least 5 or 6 different games of older men and women playing crochet in the grassy space along the water.  We couldn't tell if this was a regular Saturday afternoon activity or just the Korean National Association of Senior Crochet Players.

We continued our walk, watched a few children sadly eying their soccer ball as it floated down the river, never to return, and then made a stop at Dunkin Donuts.

Now Jessica is sleeping and I'm listening to the Clemson game on internet radio...live...at 3:30am.

a few changes....

As I'm sure you've already noticed, I made a few changes to the blog.  First, the look is a bit different.  A little brighter.  A little cleaner.  I like it.  Second, I'm making a commitment to myself to write more often, and more regular.  I've found myself quite often not wanting to post anything new here because nothing funny happened in the past few days.  Its not everyday in the school cafeteria that a kid laughs so hard that kimchi comes out of his nose.  Nor is it a regular occurrence that another male teacher at my school says to me with very broken English "I want to get alone with you."  (He wanted some one-on-one time to practice his English...I think.)  Bless his heart.  So I made the decision to use this blog for its original purpose: to keep everyone at home up to date with our daily lives on the other side of the world.  If nothing funny happens, nothing funny is posted.  Just the facts ma'am, just the facts.  So I hope you continue to read, be intrigued, and eventually leave everything you've ever known and move to the far east.  We'll leave the light on for ya'.